The World Is Lovely Sporadic trivialities aimed to please

8Dec/092

Apis Clue-Writing Competition: ASSASSIN

Hot on the heels of PROPELLING, it’s ASSASSIN! You don’t want an assassin hot on your heels. Luckily this isn’t actually hot on anything’s heels.

I’m not even going to bother with @ndrew_Taylor this week. His entry was insipid and uninspired and you can look it up for yourself. His namesake compensated with a bit of surrealism and some unusual wordplay:

A swan’s standing at the north pole, in Booth

Spoiler
‘A’ is A. At the north pole, all directions are south, so SWANS becomes SSASS. ‘In’ is IN, and Booth is the bloke who shot Lincoln.

@frizfrizzle was a little more down to earth:

Top assistant doubles in fatal fashion

Spoiler
ASS (‘Top assistant’) doubles, giving ASSASS. ‘In’ clues IN, and the definition is a bit vague in classic Friz fashion.

Kilbey just went for all-out literalism. He’s a busy man and he doesn’t have time for your nonsense.

Villain who is, at heart, classed as evil

Spoiler
ASS is the heart of ‘classed’; ‘as’ is AS; ‘evil’ is SIN. The definition is ‘Villain’.

Elegant! But perhaps not as elegant as @apaultaylor’s fine effort:

Ignoring initial pass, a spade is returned by North – ‘one down’ is usually the result of his contracts

Spoiler
‘Ignoring initial pass’ clues ASS, ‘a spade’ is AS, ‘is returned’ is SI and North is N. An assassin is contracted to take someone down.

That’s a pretty good clue even if you don’t love bridge as much as Paul does. But it hasn’t taken the prize, and only partly because I wanted to punish his disgusting self-assurance. Mainly, it’s because another cleverly-defined clue, simple though it was, tickled me more:

First ask setter’s sister’s approval; second, send Interflora narcissi: he might take you out (@miche)

Spoiler
It’s a straightforward acronym, the indicator being ‘First’ and the definition ‘he might take you out’.

I assume, given it’s in the third person, that the setter in question is supposed to be me rather than Miche, which means it’s slightly flawed – I don’t have a sister and I’m not available – but also raises the interesting point that this clue wouldn’t work nearly as well in a different context. Miche wins a copy of Day of the Jackal, just as soon as I’ve found one cheap enough or got a job.

Comments (2) Trackbacks (0)
  1. But she said she was your sister, and she charged me a fifty-quid “introduction fee”….

    No, “the setter in question” isn’t you, or me, or anyone else or their dog. “Setter’s” is only there to provide an S, and hopefully to add a little misdirection (MY? MINE?) in what is, as you say, a pretty simple clue. I think I toyed with “sailor’s sister” first, if you’ll pardon the expression.

    Anyway, I’m glad it tickled. No need to go out and buy a prize. Send me a jpeg of a gold star.

    • Oh, you don’t get out of the prize so easily. If you refuse to provide an address for it I’ll put a note in the front of a copy and give it to a charity shop in your honour.

      Actually, that’s probably a better prize.


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